How to Survive the Pandemic as a Planner
There are a lot of planners out there in the world. Are you one of them? There is a broad spectrum of people that fall between ‘planner’ and someone who flies by the seat of their pants. I have surely been grateful for the planners in my life; organizing gatherings, booking restaurants, setting dates that work for everyone. And in some categories, like travel, I happen to be a planner myself. I make travel books for every trip I take, with insurance, tickets, contacts, embassy numbers, history of the area, etc. I love making these so much, I’d happily make them for a friend’s trip if they asked. A little nerdy maybe, but I love it. So planners and planning can definitely come in handy. But it can be very hard to live in a world with an unpredictable future and stick to hyper-planning tendencies.
This pandemic has shifted the way people go about their lives. It’s changed borders, movement in the world, and capacity to go about one’s daily life. Unfortunately, with more devastating impacts for some than others. And let’s examine your planning tendency with some flexibility, because things are sometimes what we make them to be. If you can fuel your planning tendencies onto the next few hours, or throughout the current day, it can give you something to look forward to, and a sense of empowerment in the present moment. However, let’s look at shifting planning tendencies for the future. Because even one month from now looks uncertain during this pandemic. So how can you ease up your grip on this to reduce your suffering?
Don’t make assumptions. Making assumptions about an unknown future is causing you unnecessary suffering in the present moment. You don’t have a crystal ball, so don’t expect with such certainty that things will turn out the way you’re expecting them to. This doesn’t mean don’t take precautions when it’s prudent to do so. But don’t make assumptions about things so far in the future they don’t affect your life currently. Our brains jump to this because our minds have built-in alarm systems. Humans have a tendency to want to know the future, because it has kept us safe in the past. Sometimes it takes a small manual over ride to remind ourselves that it isn’t always helpful to worry about an unknown future. And you don’t actually know how you’ll be feeling at a future point in time, so don’t pin yourself down.
Hold space for the unknown. What does this look like in action? It could look like being curious about how things might turn out, but not needing things to look a certain way. It could look like having compassion for yourself every time you have a thought about where you’ll be a year from now. Holding space for the unknown includes trusting your ability to brainstorm and make good decisions for yourself in the moment. Because if you trust yourself in the moment, then you don’t need to grasp onto plans that might not turn out the way you expect. Holding space for the unknown can ultimately serve you well throughout your life. Because the pandemic is not the only aspect of life that is constantly changing. Easing up on the timeline of your planning to the current day or two can help reduce your suffering and also open you up to opportunities you might not have expected.
Increase current connection. Increase the connection you feel within yourself and to the people around you. Find ways to reach out in methods that are possible at this point in time, and fuel your relationships as much as you can. Increasing connection with yourself can look like starting a meditation practice, taking yourself out on walks, journaling to explore your inner world, or dancing solo at the end of a long work day. If you feel connected to yourself and the people most important to you, you won’t have to rely as much on future plans to boost your sense of joy.
Slow down and savour future possibilities. Do you miss travelling? Book a date night with a virtual tour in Rome, and begin to learn Italian with an app on your phone. Dreaming about Italy, and experiencing it in ways like a virtual tour can be extremely satisfying. Our mind has incredible capacities for bringing up emotions and revelling in inner experiences. If you think you’d be frustrated by this exercise, without being able to visit Italy or have tangible plans to do so, consider what assumptions might be attached to this. Why does the actual trip itself have to be the only enjoyable experience? Does the fact that the tickets are not in your hand mean the trip won’t happen? Even if you can’t predict when the plans will take place, give yourself some space to savour your dreams about future plans. Take out an atlas, buy a travel journal, take a virtual tour of a museum you’ll visit one day. Slow down and savour these dreams. It can apply to anything you hope to do once the restrictions in the world ease up.
Reflect on your planning tendency. Take out a some paper and take some time to reflect on whether planning things so far in advance actually improves your quality of life or not. And I won’t make any assumptions, because maybe you truly love it, and don’t want to change a thing! But if you find there’s no clear answer, tap into this question further. I have read and heard from numerous mentors in my life that the things they’ve been most excited about in their lives have arisen unexpectedly. They weren’t things that were planned. And how many quotes have you heard to this effect:
“Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans”
John Lennon
“We will only understand the miracle of life fully when we allow the unexpected to happen.”
Paulo Coelho
Consider what role serendipity has had in your life in the past, and get excited about things that will excite you unexpectedly in the future. Because I’d be willing to bet it’s bound to happen :)
I’d love to hear from you in the comments! And let me know what you’d like to see more of in future blog posts, or if you have any questions I can help you with. Wishing you all the best 🙋🏻♀️